Showing posts with label Howard Stern. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Howard Stern. Show all posts

Monday, 15 August 2011

Baby Gorilla Is Saved: Artie Lange Coming Back To Radio This Fall

In a candid and wide-ranging new interview the comedian Artie Lange talks about the rehabilitation treatment he has undergone in his year-and-a-half hiatus from performing, and discusses the details of a new radio program he plans to host in September.

During a conversation recorded for the “Fixing Joe” podcast hosted by his friend and fellow comedian Joe Matarese (and which we were pointed to by laughspin.com), Mr. Lange said he would begin broadcasting a show for Fox Sports Radio on Sept. 12, though the network said this was not the case.

Mr. Lange described the new program, which he said he would host with the comedian Nick DiPaolo, as a “a sports entertainment kind of comedy show,” and said it would be carried in about 250 markets in the United States. He added that there was a possibility the DirecTV satellite service might show the program on television “if it goes well enough.”

Dan Bell, a spokesman for Fox Sports, said, “That’s not true. Nothing against him. We’re looking for a more traditional sports-host personality.” A press representative for Mr. Lange wrote in an e-mail, “We are excited by the overwhelming interest in Nick and Artie. But there is no job to confirm for them at this time.”

Mr. Lange cautioned in the podcast interview, “Nothing’s been signed yet but we’re going to do it.” He added: “This is a bad negotiating tactic, but it’s either this or opening a landscape business for me at this point.”

Mr. Lange has been on a hiatus from “The Howard Stern Show” since late 2009. Throughout the interview, which Mr. Matarase described as “two old friends talking about things from their heart,” Mr. Lange talked about the help he has sought for anxiety and his addiction to drugs and alcohol.

Mr. Lange said in the last year and a half he had been in two rehabilitation facilities and three psychiatric wards. “I’ve got to say,” he said with a laugh, “you haven’t lived till you’ve played Scrabble in a psych ward. It’s really a fun time.”

He said he felt compelled to get clean after the deaths of the comedians Mitch Hedberg, who died of a drug overdose in 2005, and Greg Giraldo, a close friend who died in September and had an overdose of prescription drugs a few days earlier.

“The whole idea of death started to freak me out more than it ever did,” Mr. Lange said. He added: “It just made me want to stick around. It really did.”

Having spent so much time away from comedy stages and broadcast booths, Mr. Lange said he realized there was value to working out his issues in front of an audience.

“It’s weird because standup can be like therapy,” he said. “Comedians can’t be satisfied with just having fun with our friends. We’ve got to figure out a way to do it on stage. I’ve got to figure out a way to make a guy paying $11 for a Rolling Rock laugh at this.”

Sunday, 14 August 2011

6 To Midnight: Gaga's New Fanboy

Raise your hand if you think Lady Gaga is a dumb drunken weird butter face?  Yeah me too, but after I heard this interview/performance on the Howard Stern Show the other day I cant help but be impressed with her talent as a musician. 

As of right now I am officially into Lady Gaga.  Shes smokin hot.  What else is there?









Tuesday, 12 July 2011

1,001 Ways To Fuck With A Retard





1001. Call them and represent yourself as the "Flu" or "Influenza" virus...thus scaring the retard which in turn provokes a cry out for help; with curses like "Shoo, shoo no retarded flu".  Watch

987. Trick the retard into arguing with an automated answering machine.  Watch

900. Insert the original retard into a situation where he interacts with another retard.  Crack beverage.  Repeat and enjoy.  Watch
#2  Gary the Retard

834. Do not ever, and I stress EVER, give them what they want.  Watch

750. Put the retard to the test by playing "Are You Smarter Than A Caribou".  There's no plot twist.  The retard will lose this match-up 10 of 10 times.  Watch

715. Spelling bee.  Watch

567. Have him call his own phone and leave a voice-mail.  Call the retard back immediately and play him the voice-mail he just left himself 5 minutes ago.  This will confuse the retard into thinking he is having his identity stolen.  Watch

480. Ask them to do favors for you which are light years above and beyond what they are capable of doing.  Watch

401. Cry in front of the retard and see how it goes.  Watch

220. When asked a question, in the response replace words with heavy breathing and only heavy breathing.  Watch

125. Direct the retard to into a situation where he must hear the voice of the late Billy Mays and respond.  Accomplish this any way you can.  No rules on this one.  Watch

60. Are you even the real retard?  Watch

18. Rain down rude insensitive comments on said "retard".  Watch

4. Use them as ammunition and attack Danny Bonaduce.  Watch

2. Karaoke. Big crowd. Extreme retardation mixed with an over-indulgence of alcohol.  Black Eyed Peas.  Lets get retard.  Enough said.  Watch

1.  Spend a good part of a day.  I'm talking like 4 straight hours...doing any thing and everything in your power to keep the retard on the phone.  It just keeps getting better and better and better.  Watch



Stay tuned for Part 3 of "Beetlejuice and the Top 25 Wack Packers":   Jeff the Drunk

Saturday, 4 June 2011

Takin' a Beet



#1 Beetlejuice
Part 1 of "Beetlejuice and the Top 25 Wack Packers"

Things we know about the Howard Stern Show's brightest star, Beetlejuice:

-  He gets high with the women
-  He don't know, this is not his chair
-  He's a badass man
-  He is 6'7" and weighs 800 lbs


Simply put, Beetle is the man.  He has a private talent manager/professional boxer Bobby Rooney whom he trains.  Beet is a media mogul having appeared in multiple movies, TV shows, has his own theme song that was composed and performed by Staind,  and has been hired to do voice overs in video games.

His movies include Scary Movie 2, Bubble Boy, Girls Gone Dead, Channel 101 and others.  Some if his TV appearances are are on Howard TV as a regular, WWE, Son of the Beach, True Crime New York, and Doggy Fizzle Tellevizzle.  Beet even stars in his own reality show, "This is Beetle" that runs on Howard TV.  All this while being a 3 foot midget with a pin sized head.  Beet, a native of New Jersey, has his own "tossing" gig.  When i say tossing, I mean exactly what it sounds like I mean.  You pay him to show up...everybody proceeds to take as much booze to the face as humanly possible, and you toss around Beet and a few other midgets he employs in a competition to see who can toss the midget the furthest.  He will makes appearances at events and bachelor parties, but only if you are ready to shell out Benjamins.  Interested?  Head on over to jollydwarf.com to book.


In 2008 Beet was a New York State Senator candidate.  Some of his stances on controversial topics included:

Abortion:  "I love abortion...it's good.  I gets high with the women.  I'm a badass man."

Tax Cuts:  "I'll pay the people of New York $1, 000, 000 and they'll pay only $24 in taxes.  I can get paid, and I get get laid.  I do dangerous shit you never seen people do before."

Education System:  "Everybody go to school for 44 years.  I'll bury that ass."


Drugs:  "I do drugs every day.  Kids should do drugs, faggots should do drugs.  Bitches and whores they can do drugs and they want to get high?  Hey...I got all the shit they can have."


Lester "Beetlejuice" Green is a midget, a retard, and a prick...but to the Stern Fan Nation and the rest of the Wack Pack he remains exactly where he belongs.  On top as a champion.  A true #1.







Stay tuned for Part 2 of "Beetlejuice and the Top 25 Wack Packers":   Gary the Retard

Thursday, 2 June 2011

Beetlejuice & The Top 25 Wack Packers

The Howard Stern Show is a big part of my life on a day to day basis. I really don't know if our readers listen or not, but if you do then you certainly know about the Wack Pack! If you don't...then you should and the posts that are to follow this "Wacky" introduction will individually profile each lovable retard and their mind boggling antics...starting with the world "Beet"-er, Beetlejuice.  This is my top 25 and this is the same order in which I will be posting.




1.   Beetlejuice (6/4/11)
2.   Gary the Retard (7/12/11)
3.   Jeff the Drunk
4.   High Pitch Eric
5.   Eric the Midget
6.   Big Foot
7.   Riley Martin
8.   Ass Napkin Ed
9.   Iron Sheik
10. Yucko the Clown
11. Hanzi
12. Underdog Lady
13. Wendy the Retard
14. Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf
15. Medicated Pete
16. Pete the Asian Virgin
17. Scott the Engineer
18. Will the Farter
19. Sour Shoes
20. Daniel Carver
21. Evil Dave Letterman
22. King of All Blacks
23. John the Stutterer
24. Blue Iris
25. Crazy Alice