Revenge?

In 2007, Appalachian State was supposed to be a cupcake opponent. They weren't. So what would a rematch bring? Revenge?
The Michigan football team announced on Thursday that the Wolverines will open the 2014 season with a rematch against the Division 1-AA powerhouse. Yes, against the same school that upset Lloyd Carr's Michigan team, 34-32, and sent shock waves through Ann Arbor and the college football world.
That loss, the first in Carr's final season as coach, ended with Appalachian State blocking a Wolverine field goal attempt. One could argue that it was the first in a long line of embarrassments and disappointment that has hung over the team since Carr's final season and Rich Rodriguez's tumultuous three-year stint as coach.
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I wouldn't call this "revenge". It's more like if a girl broke your heart and then you spend the next 7 years lifting and banging out "practice girls" until she calls you all hammered one night. Finally the chance to redeem yourself. You get that revenge sex out of your system and wonder, did it really make you feel better about yourself? Probably not.
In reality, this revenge doesn't change the fact that your squad had the most embarrassing loss in NCAA football history, in your own barn, with Lloyd at the helm. It's like the kid that was super popular in elementary school. He Got all the girls, was cool with all the teachers, and parents wanted you to be more like him. What a smug, kiss-ass fuck. Until one year he throws up on everyone on stage during the school Christmas play, and pisses himself in embarrassment. You'll inevitably run into this kid at some point in your life and even though now he is very successful, and has the world by the balls, you'll still see him as Pisspants McVomit. Just wallowing around in his own bodily fluids and secretions. Nothing will ever change that. And you know that somehow that turn of events has made the universe right again.

Here's To Forgetting About The Past: Round 4

Earning the wings.

Year after year after year.

Another Joke About Brady Hoke

Knock knock

Whos there?

Another dumb shit UM football coach

Hoke's Decision to Redshirt Darryl Stonum a Joke

Darryl Stonum, University of Michigan's senior wide receiver, has been named a redshirt senior for the up-coming 2011 season. Stonum picked up a second DUI earlier this summer and has been dealing with disciplinary issues since that ordeal. Brady Hoke suspended Stonum indefinitely after the incident and just announced the decision to redshirt his star wide receiver instead of suspending him.

Hoke stated, "While it would be great to have Darryl on the field this season, we feel it is in our best interest of our program for him to redshirt".

As an outsider looking in at the issue, I begin to think that this is sending a bad message to the team under Hoke's first year as coach. Yes, Hoke is suspending Hagerup and Robinson for games; however, let's look at each of these scenarios.

Will Hagerup (punter): suspended 4 games--probably won't see much action since Michigan's high-powered offense won't need to punt much in the 1st 4 games (exception to the Notre Dame game and maybe the San Diego St. game). Therefore, Hagerup's suspension will most likely will not have a large effect on the team)

Terrence Robinson (wide receiver): suspended 1 game--With Roundtree, Odoms, Grady, and Hemmingway already in the line-up, Robinson's suspension will not be a big deal at all vs. the Western Michigan Broncos.

Darryl Stonum (wide receiver): redshirt senior year--This couldn't have come at a better time for the University of Michigan's football program. With Odoms, Grady, and Hemmingway all seniors this coming season, the Wolverines will be hurting for receivers in the 2012 season. Redshirting Stonum for this season is not only a perfect time for the program as Stonum will have full eligibility for next season, it is also perfect timing for Stonum and his future aspirations to play in the NFL. The other option besides redshirting would have been suspending him for 5 or 6 games. This would significantly hurt his stock in the NFL draft. Yes, he sits out this season. But, he has all of this year to develop and all of next year to showcase his skills with senior quarterback Denard Robinson throwing him the football. Michigan will now be returning Roundtree and Stonum in 2012, instead of just Roundtree. Since the Wolverines have zero, yes I repeat zero, wide receivers committed for the recruiting class of 2011 or 2012, Stonum's return in 2012 is absolutely perfect timing.

Crafty decision making on Hoke's part; however, I do believe it gives the players the notion that getting in trouble under Hoke's reign will not have a big effect on their time as a U of M football player. As Brady Hoke stated in the interview, "it is in our best interest of our program for him to redshirt". Yes, this makes sense for Hoke to redshirt him, but as a leader and a mentor of the players, this simply isn't right. Stonum is being allowed to play the same number of games as he would have played, he just has to wait a year to do that. Suspending Stonum might not have been the most popular or the easiest decision to make for 1st-year coach Brady Hoke; however, it would have been the right one.

You Raise Me Up: Looking Back On A Legend

A Tribute To Rich Rodriguez 

The Invincibility, The Magic Around the Michigan Program As It Relates To the Michigan State Spartans Is Dead

Hail?  Check.
Victor?  Check.
Valiant?  Check. Conquering Hero? Check.

Worst hire in Division 1-A history?  Check.

Former University of Michigan Head football coach, Rich Rodriguez, represents so many different things to so many different people.  To a West Virginia fan he is a winner turned traitor.  To a Michigan fan he is a terrible mistake.  To Pat White and Steve Slaton he is a genius.   To Tate Forcier he is a tease.  To Denard "Shoelace" Robinson he is a baby maker.  To his own defense he is a child.

So what exactly does Coach Rod represent to me?  I'll tell you what.  Hes a valiant victor.  Hes  my conquering hero.  He serves as an inspiration to me and anybody else who's been burdened with a few less brain cells than the kid next to him. He is a provider...of entertainment and endless trips to the end zone for just about every player lucky enough to stand opposite his defense.  All joking aside (truthfully this is not a joke), I want to take this moment right now and thank Dick for all he's done.  Thank you Dick...you will be missed.

It seems like only yesterday that Michigan was pounding little brother into submission year in and year out.  Legit verified ass whippings on the reg. In my 6 year college career at Michigan State we did not beat them once. Then along comes Coach.  Granted, I no longer call East Lansing my home but I'll forever call the Spartans my team and no one man did more for my team than Rich Rodriguez.  Like a thief in the night he took the reigns and started losing at break neck speed.  Michigan's losses started piling up like they have never piled up before...and to make my long point a little shorter, the end result of his first year was a 3-9 record, which kick started what would become the worst 3 year stretch in Michigan Football history.

Rich is the king of getting ESPN to give a kid a Heisman trophy after week 4.  Only to find out that they were really only pasting the cream puffs he would schedule every year non-conference.  See Tate and Denard.  Rich is also famous for his title as king of the post game pout, as evidence reveals in the 3 or 4 times he busted out into tears because his feelings got hurt.  I mean a grown, head football coaching man cried at press conferences.  A lot.  To top all this off, shortly after he knew he was getting canned he famously stood in front of his players, their families, and UM faithful alike and figured that all he had to do to win his job back was play a Groban track, start the sniffles, and shed a tear or two.  That must not have gone as he planned because instead of getting the job he got humiliated.  Whatever you want to call it...the facts remain, that was some of the most embarrassing and most bizzare behavior NCAA college football has ever seen.  Dick is like a train wreck and a treat all mixed into one.  He may disappoint his team and his fans, but this guy never disappointed me.  What an absolute joy it is just to know that hes a real person.   The only thing that could make this better would be Ohio State giving him the head coaching job due to his above average skill set in a.) breaking NCAA rules and b.) destroying dreams in Ann Arbor.

You know what else is kind of funny?  So now they hire Brady Hoke or as I like to call him "PLAN C".  Somehow this mid-major "Michigan Man" is only 47-50 playing against second rate squads and I can't help but feel eerily similair to the same way I felt at the start of the Rodriguez regime.  Not like it matters and not like I really care anyways.  As long as Michigan continues to lose...I continue to win, because if theres anything I like more than a Spartan W it's a Wolverine L.

Michigan Career Highlights Include:

0 - Wins against MSU
0 - Wins against OSU
Worst 3 stretch season Michigan has ever seen
A 52-14 loss to Mississippi State in the Gator Bowl when his job was publicly on the line
Cries at football banquet

Walmart Wolverines